Tag Archives: Big Angry Trev

Movie Review – My Little Pony

November 27, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

My Little Pony, much like its boyish counterpart – The Transformers, has a generations spanning popularity. Despite the 5 to 12 age range on the boxes, just as Transformers is not just for little boys, My Little Pony is not just for little girls. And now, like The Transformers, My Little Pony has hit the big screen!

Now let me start off by saying I know waaaay more about MLP than any self-respecting 40 year old male should. As the househusband I watch it with my two kids when it comes on TV at 8.30am every morning after their mother goes to work. In fact I probably know almost every episode from Season 4 onwards off by heart! Whilst my daughter loves Fluttershy and my son and wife both love Pinkie Pie, I’m most definitely a Rarity man, whom I find really sexy amusing, especially when she throws a drama queen fit. I also really like DJ Pon3 for some reason, she is just so cool! The cartoon itself is really well done, it’s thoroughly amusing on many levels and I defy anyone to watch the 100^th episode special from season 5 and not crack up laughing! Fantastic battle scenes, great music, an interesting and ever expanding cast – in fact I can confidently say it’s probably one of the best kids cartoons out there today. As such I was hoping for a lot from the movie when I took my family to see it …

… but sadly it did not deliver.

Don’t get me wrong – it’s certainly not a bad movie. But if you are familiar with the cartoon this feels like they have watered it down for the movie rather than beefing it up. A good way would be to compare them to ice cream. The cartoon is triple-raspberry swirl with rainbow sprinkles – delicious and exciting! The movie is a bowl of vanilla – certainly nice enough and you may even want a second helping but you aren’t going to rave about it to your friends.

The storyline is very formulaic, but given the target audience for this flick that is forgivable. All the ponies are gathered for a giant party being organised by the heroine of the show Twilight Sparkle, when the bad guys turn up, capture the other 3 Princesses of Equestria and enslave the Pony race. Cue Twilight and her friends escaping, meeting new comrades in their search for help, then returning to defeat the big bad, turn an enemy into a friend (cause Friendship is Magic dontcha know) and bring freedom back to the land. I think even most young kids, whom this movie is primarily aimed at, could predict what would happen next in a very by-the-numbers plot.

Sadly, everything that happens feels like a sanitized version of the cartoon, designed to have the broadest appeal by ‘playing it safe’ . The one argument between friends (Twilight finally after all these years gets a gutful of Pinkie Pie) is very short and undramatic, as opposed to some of the larger Rarity & Applejack spats from television. Likewise the music, which should be a major highlight in a movie like this, lacks punch and is not particularly catchy. The 2014 Equestria Girls Rainbow Rocks has far superior music that sticks in the head and keeps you humming for days. The animation, which given the world the storyline is set in had the potential to dazzle, suffers from bland backgrounds, though these are necessitated by the storyline sending the ponies through deserts and other sparse locals. Tempest Shadow is a pretty cool bad guy with her sparking broken horn and is rounded out fairly well on the whole. However her boss, The Storm King, is a predictable character who is frankly neither scary or amusing, despite the writers trying to portray him as both.

There is not much character development here. Given the cartoon is in its seventh season perhaps it was felt there is not much more for the 7 stars of the show to grow into. It would have been nice for the girls to at least use their different abilities in significant ways to aid the plot. Rarity’s entire contribution consists of performing a 2 second fix on a coat, earning them a friend in a roguish cat which in turn ends up giving Spike his only interesting thing to do in the movie – being used by said cat as a flamethrower. Rainbow Dash awakens the buccaneering spirit of some air pirates, but her signature sonic-rainboom does nothing but give their position away to the bad guys. Applejack and Fluttershy sadly bring nothing at all to the plot and in fact the movie could have easily been done without them. None of the characters really engage in the kind of humorous banter that makes the cartoon so funny and don’t really bounce off each other, mainly they just react to events and – in the case of Fluttershy at least – look scared.

*(my t-shirt) Should have just let these two handle the problem*

The two stars of the movie from the regular cast are Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle. Pinkie serves as the anchor of the group, being too silly-headed to have her spirit brought low by the various precarious predicaments. Meanwhile Twilight allows herself to lose hope but in the end, predictably, uses the spirit of Friendship to win Tempest Shadow over the side of good and defeat The Storm King.

So is this movie worth watching? Well again, it’s like a bowl of vanilla ice cream. You will enjoy it but you will soon forget you consumed it afterwards. I laughed out loud a couple of times but sadly my two young kids never did. Given the price of a movie ticket these days you can easily wait for this to be released on DVD and in the meantime get your MLP on with the brilliant cartoon instead.

*One day Rarity my sweet, one day we will be together!*

This movie gets 3 out of 5 party cannons.

Got something to say about this movie? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

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Tales of the Trev

Big Old Trev turns 40

November 7, 2017 Big Angry Trev 7 Comments

There are lots of cool ages. When you turn 18 you are legally an adult – able to get pissed and drive at will (even if not at the same time). When you turn 21 it usually signals finishing your higher education and departing off into the big world. When you turn 30, it’s a celebration of surviving all the stupid shit you did in your teens and twenties.

When you turn 40 however – it just means you are f*cking old

Well loyal readers, today I turn 40. And I can confirm it is not a cool age to turn. No teenager thinks turning the big Four Oh will be fun and they are right. I don’t feel cool, I don’t feel special, I don’t feel like I am on the cusp on a great adventure. What I do feel is a tiredness in my limbs, a soreness in my back and a general irritation with the world.

(Writers note: I wrote the above a few days beforehand so I would have this piece ready. Now it’s the actual day I’ve been spoiled rotten by my family and received a slew of well wishes from people so it is actually making my day pretty damn cool. However it would ruin the theme of the piece so lets just pretend I’m still not feeling special eh?)

So what the hell happened? How did this happen to me? I mean, I remember being young and looking at people like me, thinking why and how could they give up?! And young Trev is still inside, looking out through these tired old eyes, feeling like a young man trapped in an old farts body. I used to party all night and play video games all day. I used to sleep with stranger’s, drink and smoke near anything passed my way, get into fights with buddies and then wake up the next day feeling a million bucks to do it all over again. Now I go to bed sober at a decent hour and I still wake up tired. What. Happened. To. Me?

In fact, let’s have a look at the progression of my life in some key categories.

Drinking

Teens: Any alcohol our fake ID’s could get us

Twenties: Scotch & Cokes at the pub

Thirties: Beers with mates

…and now: Cup’o’Soup before bed

Music

Teens: Whatever was on MTV

Twenties: Whatever was on Rage

Thirties: Whatever was on Triple J

…and now: ‘Hey Diddle Diddle, the cat and the fiddle’

Parties

Teens: Getting pissed at 18^th’s

Twenties: Getting munted at 21^st’s

Thirties: Dinner parties with friends

…and now: Driving my kids to other children’s birthdays

Work

*My brief stint as a night porter in Scotland*

Teens: Below minimum wage at a fruit shop

Twenties: Minimum wage Security Guard

Thirties: Decently paid Departmental Employee

…and now: I clean my wife’s house

Travel

Teens: Interstate trips to theme parks

Twenties: Backpacked around Europe

Thirties: Honeymoon to Vanuatu

…and now: To the shops and back

Video Games

Teens: Street Fighter II on the Super Nintendo

Twenties: Halo on the Xbox

Thirties: Fall of Cybertron on the PS3

…and now: Hoping for a nap while my son plays the PS4

Women

Teens: I made my girlfriends laugh

Twenties: I made the ladies swoon

Thirties: I made my wife smile

…and now: I make my daughters bed

It first really sunk in I was getting older about 3 years ago. Back in my twenties, when I had a gleam in my eye, an ever-present bulge in my trousers and a six-pack under my shirt, I used to get my hair elaborately done at the hairdressers at least every six weeks. I used to really enjoy it too; I always had two or three of the young women on staff hanging about while I made them laugh and unashamedly flirted. Used to walk out looking great, feeling great and more often than not having charmed my way into getting a nice big discount.

Three years ago I was getting my tips done blond when the hairdresser said ‘Oh it’s so great when men your age get this done – my step-father gets his done and it really helps hide the grey’.

*‘No really, its my natural hair colour’*

The look of horror on my face said it all as I had been unaware that I had any grey hairs! Also, this girl was comparing me to her father figure?! Yep – if I had dusted off my old flirt-circuits she would have no doubt classified me as an old creep and locked the door as I left – no discounts for old fart Trev.

So are there any upsides to getting this old? The main three I can think of are that you are less of a dickhead, less inclined to tolerate bullshit and are more self-reliant. These days I actually think before I open my mouth to say whatever random thought passes through this oddly-wired brain of mine, and getting naked in public is truly a thing of the past. I won’t cop shit or tolerate bullshit – I quit a job because of something that happened to me and I knew that if I continued to work there my self-respect wouldn’t allow me to look in the mirror anymore – that was a very depressing time for me. As for self-reliance, it may have taken me decades longer than some males but now I only call a tradie as a last resort. I always try to build it or fix it myself and if I can’t then I watch how the tradie does it so I can do it myself from that point on.

So today for the first time I look in the mirror and a forty year old man looks back at me. It’s been a helluva ride. I’ve traveled the world and learned how to order a beer in a dozen languages. I’ve had a Uni Radio Show, appeared on Television, Sworn on the Big Screen and done Stand-Up Comedy at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. I’ve been painfully thin then fat then buff then… kinda flowing. I’ve lived in Melbourne and London and even returned to the Mallee for a while. I’ve lost my parents but had children of my own. I’ve become the sum of my experiences…. which somehow has turned me into a Blog Writing, Hobby Farming, Househusband and Father who spends his days looking after his kids and propagating plants. Doesn’t sound much but really when you think about it, having a loving wife, beautiful son & daughter, a big house in the hills (even if it’s not mine) and only working for others when I feel like it – I may have not become the megastar I thought I would but I could have done a lot worse that’s for sure.

So what pearls of wisdom have I learned that can prepare others for turning the big Four Oh? Well… none. Nada, Zip, Zippo. It’s going to affect each one of you differently. I can’t say it feels any different to being 39 and to be honest in my head I’m still 25. All I can say is that yes, the concept of turning forty sucks…

…but it’s better than the alternative 😉

Are you about to turn forty or already have? Would love to commiserate with you in the comments section below!

Retraction: I have been contacted and instructed to remove certain opinions from this blog. Due to my leaving the comments in question so vague (no names, places, dates, any specifics at all) it has lead to someone mistakenly believing the comments referred to them. Therefore to avoid continued accidental offense the instructions received have been followed; the opinions are officially and publicly retracted and have been permanently removed from this site. bigangrytrev.com apologizes for any misunderstanding regarding this matter.

Transformatorium, Transformer Toy Reviews

Toys Review – The Last Knight: Steelbane, Cogman & Sqweeks

October 23, 2017 Big Angry Trev 3 Comments

When the first live action Transformers movie was released a decade ago, I went a bit nuts when the toys were first released. The first day I saw them I horrified my girlfriend by coming home with two full garbage bags of action figures and a $700 dent in my bank account.

Now here we are at movie five and restraint is much easier. For the first time I am not buying a toy of every character that was in the movie. Who needs yet another Bbee camero? So I’m buying toys only of new characters that showed up in the flick, saving me both cash and shelf space.

Thankfully I was able to put restraint on hold the other day when I finally came across some of these new characters in toy form. So lets take a look at three new Autobots to grace the silver screen and subsequently get turned into toy-candy – Steelbane, Cogman and Sqweeks.

Steelbane

Robot Mode

Steelbane was one of those generic Knights of Cybertron to show up in the flick, and you would be hard pressed to single him out when watching the movie. I will say I am quite impressed with the look of Steelbane in robot mode – perhaps the most knight-esque Transformer I’ve ever seen! Really looks like he should be guarding a tomb for centuries and then coming to life to scare the shit out of Lara Croft. However the look of this toy is the best thing about him. The shoulder and leg balljoints are very loose, making him very hard to pose. This is made up for somewhat by the fact he has tight neck and elbow joints so you can at least give him the odd cool pose. Comes with a sword with lots of little detail on it and the wings folded behind serve to give him a look as though he is wearing a chainmail cape. So visually he looks great, playwise he is a bit of a letdown.

Dragon Mode

*This is what happens when your alpaca mates with a raven and a washing machine*

Frankly pretty crap. The loose balljoints make him even harder to pose in beast mode than robot mode. The chest does not sit flush with the main body and while I appreciate the little detail of the red tongue, it actually detracts from the dragons head when you open the mouth wider. I found the transformation to beast mode quite fiddly as well; his secondary mode is so ill defined and the instructions were not particularly useful. I ended up just looking at the back of the box and fiddling with the figure until he represented that pic.

Cogman

Robot Mode

Typical – we finally get a Transformer in one of the movies who gets a lot of lines and screen time and he never even transforms! Well thankfully they released some toys of him that do. There is a fantastic looking one with a headmaster gimmick, however since he never did it in the film I went the cheaper 1-step option. I don’t usually like 1-step changers, I find them very overpriced for the simplistic figure you get. However since I don’t want to spend a fortune importing a transforming Cogman I was happy enough to get this representation of him. They did the colour scheme and in particular the head quite well and he doesn’t look too bad at all. Just a shame that he has no knees and his legs are so chunky.

Vehicle Mode

Cogman transforms into an Aston Martin DB11, which he did get behind the wheel of in the movie if memory serves. He achieves this in toy mode by a simple twist of the legs. A nice little car, though a better paintjob wouldn’t have hurt.

Sqweeks

Robot Mode

This little guy was supposed to be the ultra-cute new bot of Transformers 5. But R2-D2 he aint and he never really captured our hearts. However if there is to be a movie toy that will garner your affection – it’ll be this little guy! While his robot mode initially looks as lackluster as the character did onscreen (though I do did all the rust in his paintjob) , it’s all his little mods that make the toy.

He has several options, he can use his little cargo trailer from his alt-mode (which we will come to momentarily) to have a sort of rocket backpack, or you can remove his little handlebar hands to affix a big arm and the huge cannon he wielded in one of the final movie fight scenes.

Vehicle Mode

Not a bad looking scooter. Well, it is a bad looking scooter I guess but it’s supposed to be so on that level it really works. The transformation to scooter is fairly straight forward but I find it helps to cheat a little and remove his handlebar hands and his head. This detracts nothing from his alt-mode and saves potential scratches to your toy by jamming everything in.

His cargo-trailer really makes the toy! It can be attached to the back which adds a lot of bulk to the toy, and then altered into a battle mode replete with cannons and guns enough to freak out the strongest Con. It also transforms into one of the coolest little maintenance bays I’ve seen this side of G1 Optims, with a toolbox to store spare parts and a very maneuverable robotic arm. Very cool indeed!

Overall

They never really seem to hit their stride with the movie toys do they? Many of the ROTF figures were fantastic but since then we’ve had DOTM which had toys too complicated and AoE whose toys were too simple. So far none of the TLK figures are massively impressive. So unless you really want representations of the new movieverse characters both Steelbane and Cogman are both easy passes. However do yourself a favour and go pick up a Sqweeks. It’s a really cool toy with lots of play value and by far one of the most enjoyable movie figures I have played with. Small on screen but big on fun!

Got something to add to the review above? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

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Meet & Greet at the Collectormania Fair

October 16, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

You know, it’s not all gravy being Big Angry Trev. I know what perceptions that a lot of the public hold of me; that I eat imported lobsters off plates of gold, served up by nubile & busty fangirls who pay for the privilege of catering to the every whim of their idol.

But no, sometimes it’s damn hard work. Especially when your online fandom want a real life public appearance. On this site, of course I am known to you all as Big Angry Trev, purveyor of whimsy and wisdom. Then to the Transformers community I am known as Big Transformer Trev, collector extraordinaire and Ozformer of the Year. It’s an honor to be venerated by ones peers on the world wide web but sometimes you have to give a little something back. You need to show up, shake a few babies, kiss a few hands and generally let people feel the warm glow of bathing in the light of your reflected glory.

To this end, I made a public appearance at the Collectormania Toy & Hobby Fair in Penrith.

It’s a bugger of a drive, I can tell ya that! Espeically on a rainy Sunday morning. The Blue Mountains seem to consist of constantly changing speed limits enforced by a plethora of speed cameras and cop cars just waiting for you to miss a single sign. Combine that with half the time you are driving on the edge of a precipice and it does not make for a relaxing country jaunt.

When I finally reached my destination I was greeted at the door by Shannon, one of the main pillars of my Ozformer of the Year campaign and a stalwart supporter. Like many celebrities I have let many of my basic social and survival skills whither so Shannon was to be my guide to the toy fair as well as a buffer between me and the general public.

*Big enough to hold back the adoring hordes*

Not long after entering I was quickly accosted by one of my long time fans Adam. Adam has been a bit of a Fanboy of mine for 20 years, even back at the start when I was doing movies and television for a living. Adam had his usual reaction to seeing me – a girlish squeal of delight and the development of a mild erection. Given the regularity I illicit these reactions from my fans I was able to still smile and give him a hug, albeit from the side rather than the front.

*“Yes yes, I am your sexy god. I get that a lot”*

Shannon then gave me the tour of the Fair. This was my first toyfair and I found that they are significantly different to pop culture expos. No cosplay for a start. No huge displays either. And there were very few women to be seen. I think I saw less than a dozen the whole morning and those that I did see might as well have had ‘wife’ or ‘daughter’ stamped on their foreheads.

It was very hot in there too. I had to lose my trademark black jacket after 20 minutes, lest I start to perspire and smell like a lot of my fellow fair attendees. There was a definite essence in the air that suggested many of these guys were leaving their parents basements for the first time in a long while and bathing beforehand had no occurred to them.

It seemed like most of the stalls at the Fair stocked one of two things – either Pop! figures or Matchbox cars. Neither are really my cup of tea but I was able to find at least one I liked.

And of course, courtesy of my trusty guide Shannon, I was able to locate Transformers. I’ve never been a 3^rd Party collector, considering how many official toys there are to collect, but I will say that a 3P Bruticus I came across was a thing of beauty to behold and it took a force of will to walk away.

However I was rewarded with some G2 goodness! G2 Optimus AND G2 Megatron! Shannon was even able to haggle me a better deal on the Optimus. Given how much one pays online for toys like these, I was starting to see the Toy Fair’s appeal.

As Shannon showed me around I got to meet many of my fans from both the blogging world and the Transformers community. I got to meet Cranky – who was surprisingly cheerful – and Carlo and Dallas who couldn’t wipe the smiles from their dials. Also Hursty who has a Soundwave collection that surpasses even my own! Then came Brendan, the self-styled ‘Angel of Death’ who used his dark powers to lure me out to the carpark where… ehem… some shady deals were made (yes I lost LG43 Trypticon but I came home with some G1 goodies to replace him).

**Trev:** “So whats your favorite thing about meeting me so far?”
**Dallas:** “Well, we met 2 seconds ago so I’d say ‘this moment right now'”

*‘Shannon 2’ as my tour guide most unfairly referred to him.*

Soon it was time for refreshment. Meat and beer were highly sought after so I took a cadre of my more presentable fans and we ‘did lunch’. When Dallas turned up with some dark beer it earned him a place of honor next to yours truly, much to the admiration and jealousy of his peers.

And that was it. Quite the experience. Again, this kind of thing is expected of one from time to time, but I will say that the lads I got to spend time with and the rare toys I walked away with made the trip well worth while. I hope next time I have to do Big Angry Trev – Blogger, or Big Transformer Trev – Ozformer of the Year appearances I get to meet such great guys again.

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Meet your favorite blogger!

September 27, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Big Angry Trev is coming to Sydney!

That’s right – everyone favorite blogger will be making a personal appearance at the Penrith Collectormania Toy & Hobby Fair on Sunday October 15^th from noon onwards. Trev will be kissing hands and shaking babies as he meets his adoring public.

For you long time fans, this is your chance to meet your one true hero in the flesh – and win a great prize!

*‘I look forward to meeting you almost as much as you look forward to meeting me’*

All you have to do is spot me at the fair, come up and introduce yourself with “You Big Beautiful Blogging Bastard You!”

Anyone who introduces themselves in such a fashion will win a photocopied poster from Trev’s infamous 2003 Edinburgh Fringe Festival comedy show ‘The Many faces of Big (Angry) Trev’. Trev will not only sign your poster, but you can choose the poster colour – white, yellow, pink, blue or green!

Be the envy of all your friends and family and prepare to bask in the reflected glory of Big Blogger Trev – at the Penrith Panthers Pavilion on Mulga Road. See you there!

Disclaimer:

*Any actions taken by Big Angry Trev when meeting him are to be considered purely circumstantial, do not represent BigAngryTrev™ and are therefore not subject to litigation. *Anything said by Big Angry Trev – be it sexist, homophobic or incredibly racist – does not reflect the views of BigAngryTrev™ and cannot be subject to litigation. *Any liquids physically excreted by Big Angry Trev can be considered the property of BigAngryTrev™ and should not be ingested by the general public under threat of litigation.

Tales of the Trev

Househusband Tales #3 – The Library Playgroup

September 27, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Before we moved, both our children went to daycare two days a week which guaranteed chances to socialize with other kids their age. Since coming to the mountains my son has started Preschool, but with me being a househusband it makes no sense to pay to put our 2 year old daughter in daycare so she stays at home with me.

I worried that she was no longer getting to socialize with other kids in her age bracket (she is 2 ½) so was heartened to hear there was a Storytime Playgroup at the local library. I’m a big library nut and our kids love reading and being read to. In fact, we have a policy in our house – unless what we are currently doing is super important, if one of our kids brings us a book and asks to be read to, we down tools and read to them there and then. A love of literacy – every parent should encourage this in their kids.

So after dropping my son at Preschool, I took my daughter up to the Storytime Playgroup at the library which was due to start at 10am. I was initially heartened to see I was not the only male there, there was at least one other bloke there who has come along with his wife and two boys. But that was where the good impressions ended.

I thought that the sign said ‘Storytime Playgroup’, not f*cking ‘Bogan Junk Food Picnic!’

Let me give ya a rundown of the 4 other families there.

Group 1: The Chubbies

Mr & Mrs ‘Yes we will have fries with that’. Both of them looking comical sitting on little kids chairs which their massive arses spread over the edges of like spilled pancake batter. Their 2 bulbous boys were given pack after pack of Chocolate Tiny Teddies, I’m not sure their mastication ever stopped!

Group 2: The Lone Texter

Did this woman even have a kid? I don’t know, I assume one of the ones running around unfettered was hers. I never saw her take her eyes off her phone. She just sat on her prolific posterior on the floor, leaning her back against a bookshelf (I think sitting up would have been too much exercise for her) staring at her phone, alternating between texting and checking social media. I’m guessing literacy is a closed book to her.

Group 3: The Mongoloids

This woman had three kids with her, guessing their ages ranged between 30 and 48 months. However all 3 still had dummies in their mouths and I’m guessing they won’t be weaned off them any time soon. She also had them on tethers – you know those awful backpack things with a long rope attached so kids won’t run away in crowds? She had these on all her kids and whenever one got a bit far away she would angrily snap some verbal instruction and then physically snap on the cord even harder, bringing the kid backwards towards her to land on their arse and cry throughout the next story.

Group 4: The Brits

Now here was the only other parent present who was of normal human proportions. But given what she was feeding her kids frankly this was a surprise. This Pommie lady, as soon as she sat with her three kids, brought out a multipack bag of Cheetos Cheese & Bacon Balls. She then dispensed the smaller packs within to her 3 kids, the youngest of which could not have been more than 18 months old.

*Apparently a part of any toddlers nutritious breakfast*

So by the time the librarian came out and started to read, all the kids were either that busy eating absolute shit that they couldn’t hear her over their own chewing, or they were literally reaching the end of their tether and then crying their pudgy little arses off!

What the f*ck was going on!?!

Now don’t get me wrong, I give my kids treats now and then. Today for instance it’s been a hot sunny day so I took them to the park for an hour, then on the way home we all got ice creams. But that kind of sugary snack is a treat, not the norm. I’m proud to say the amount of sugary treats my kids get each week you could count on one hand. If they want a snack at home, fruit is what is always on offer, with the occasional seaweed cracker. Banana’s, strawberries, pears, apples, mandarins, oranges – this is what my kids have for a snack.

And since when did it become OK to eat in a library anyway? Last I checked when you go into a library you put your phone on silent and leave all food and drinks in your bag. You don’t treat it like you are at a AC/DC concert and chow down on crappy junk food while you watch the show!

I hadn’t brought any snacks for my daughter and she was staring at all the other kids food. The British lady with the facial piercings offered us one of her little multipacks and I politely declined. As nice a gesture as it was, I was still mentally indulging in some extreme judgment of her and it would have made me a complete hypocrite to accept, even if it would have made my daughter happy.

So yeah, stories got read but hardly anyone heard them or paid attention. A little craft exercise was done which ran more smoothly, though I noted most parents doing all the work for their kids while the children idly watched, rather than coactively helping their kids do it for themselves. Then Playgroup was finished.

I left there with a bit of a heavy heart. Given our remote location the only other playgroups for little kids are run by the local churches and my skin starts to burn and smoke whenever I step on consecrated ground. So that means I am going to have to go back as I can’t let my own judgmental attitude stop my daughter having this bi-weekly activity.

But by f*ck – if I had my way I’d be telling all these cattle to do their f*cking grazing at home!

Got something to add? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

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Transformer Toy Reviews

Toys Review – the Combiner Force Stunticons

September 24, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

The Combiner Wars brought back a love of gestalts to the Transformer franchise that other lines like the Power Core Combiners failed to do. Despite the main line having moved onto Titans Return, we expect to see more combiner teams as part of the 2018 Power of the Primes toyline.

The Decepticon combiners characters were – lets face it – always a lot more interesting and popular than the Autobot ones. The likes of Superion and Defensor were there so their Decepticon counterparts had someone to ultimately be beaten by. In recent years, as well as in Combiner Wars, we’ve seen a lot of those Decepticons crop up in other lines. We had Devastator in Revenge of the Fallen, Bruticus in Fall of Cybertron and even Abominus in Beast Hunters. Well now it’s Menasor’s turn with the Stunticons making their debut, both in the cartoon and toyline, as part of the Robots in Disguise Combiner Force franchise.

Now RID(15) has had some pretty damn underwhelming toys. Most figures seem to suffer from cheap construction and overly simplsitc mechanics and transformations. And sadly, the Stunticons continue this trend.

*‘We exist to make your G1 toys look good’*

Only Motormaster and Drag Strip are present from the original lineup. They are now joined by Slashmark, Heatseeker and Wildbreak. Having Wildbreak instead of Breakdown is kinda forgivable, considering this is the same universe as the Prime cartoon in which Breakdown died several years ago. However having Heatseeker and Slashmark feels lazy. Heatseeker is so close in looks to the Combiner Wars Offroad that Hasbro missed a great opportunity to cement him as a new character in the classic team. Likewise Slashmark is just Heatseeker with blue highlights instead of red. This spot could easily have been filled by Dead End, Wildrider or the other new Stunticon from CW – Blackjack.

All limb characters are sadly simplistic, requiring only 1 or 2 minor moves to go from Vehicle to Robot – both modes looking quite average. Articulation is non-existent. Motormaster however has been a bit better engineered and I quite like his alt-mode, very remincient of RID(01) Ultra Magnus.

But like his smaller partners, articulation is a quality sorely lacking in his robot mode.

And speaking of his robot mode, lets take a look at his bonce. Oh they got the square helmet just right but look at the face within…

That’s bloody Megatron! WTF?! That’s Megs from the Prime cartoon – my oath it is! Once you realize this, it makes a lot of the similarities in the head and shoulders of Menasor to Magatronus all the more apparent.

Menasor’s combined mode looks ok, though a big gangly. Here we have the only bit of articulation in any of the figures, that being that Menasor can raise his arms (which sorely lack elbows) which allows him to hold his sword up.

Now some of these characters have also been released separately to the main group. I’ve seen Heatseeker as a 1-step changer in the shops, though personally I always find them to be poor toys so I passed. But I did grab the Drag Strip/Wildbreak 2-pack.

Now these characters really are no better enginnered here than with the main pack. Also somewhere in the process they have confused the characters. Wildbreak was obviously supposed to be Drag Strip considering he has a Drag Strip’ish alt-mode. My suspicion of this was confirmed when I checked out the instructions.

This is really just an unforgivably lazy mistake by the manufacturer. But then these are lazy toys. These figures also have no articulation in robot mode and their vehicle modes, particularly Drag Strip, are very uninspired.

Whilst their combined form of DragBreak looks pretty cool, his static pose does not offer much play value.

*“**Drag** **Break** – my name sounds like what your Dad used to do at work around mid-morning. But then Wild Strip would make me sound like what your mum did to earn her way through college’*

Now I’ve been pretty hard on these toys and it’s hard not to be. However in fairness they are no worse than most of the RID line so one should know what they are getting into with their purchase. The prices are much better too if you are buying for kids – you can get a whole Menasor here for the same cost of two limb characters from CW. Their combined modes have a certain style and unlike many of the other CF figures they actually do combine. But unless like me you are a complete Stunticon nut these toys are an easy pass for your average collector.

Got something to say about these figures? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

Related Articles:

Toy Review: RID Twinferno

Toys Review: Combiner Force Blurr, Windblade & Soundwave

Random Rants, Tales of the Trev

Househusband Tales #2 – Bathrooms are Bull$hIt!

September 19, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

There are certain laws of the universe that one considers immutable – one of the main ones I have always had no reason to doubt is cause and effect. If you do A, then it will cause B to happen. If you throw a ball in the air, it will come down again. If you stick your hand in the fire, it will be burned.

So if you have a room in which you use nothing but cleaning products, then ergo that room should be nothing but clean!

Seriously, why the f*ck are bathrooms exempt from the rules of cause and effect?! I’ve tidied plenty of bathrooms plenty of times but before today, in my new role as househusband, I’d never cleaned one before. Oh sure it looks clean enough, but when you get up close the friggin things are filthy!

‘Soap *SCUM?!* Since when is soap *scummy?* It doesn’t conduct phone scams does it?’

Why are they filthy? HOW are they filthy?! I took a look at all the products we have in our bathroom:

SCENTED SOAP

FOAMING CLENSER

ANTISEPTIC LISTERINE

FACIAL SCRUB

BODY WASH

Look at all the words contained within! Those are words associated with cleaning. It should be the cleanest damn room in the house!

And the bath! How can the bath be filthy?! You fill it full of hot soapy water and then drain that straight down a damn plughole! I come out cleaner after being in the bath, the kids come out cleaner after being in the bath – why doesn’t the bath come out cleaner from being within itself?!

It’s bloody madness is what it is! I spent over an hour cleaning the bathroom today and I still have the floor to mop!

Well, enough of that – I’m not going to be suckered twice! From now on I’m hosing the kids off in the yard, the wife can shower at work and as for me, well I’ll just stand downwind of people as a courtesy. Because a world where soap makes things dirtier just doesn’t make sense to me – it seems to be a joke played by a capricious universe that just wants to f*ck with my househusband brain.

Go to hell Bathroom – you porcelain-toting bastard you!

Have you encountered this freak of household nature yourself? Tell us about it in the comments section below!

Related Articles:

Househusband Tales #1 – Pampering Poorly Perfected

Tales of the Trev

Househusband Tales #1 – Pampering Poorly Perfected

September 15, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

After 16 years of being a department employee, Big Angry Trev has retired to his country estate up in the mountains to embark on a career of plant propagation. Only one problem with that…

… his wife has gone back to work full time which means he needs to care for the house as well as their two small children.

This is the first of many tales about his new career as a househusband.

Treat others the way you would like to be treated.

An axiom to live by, one I have tried to embody but by no means have ever been its poster child.

With the wife going back to work its put me in the new position as househusband, a relatively unfamiliar role. Being a bit lost at sea I thought perhaps I should go with “what I used to wish my wife would do for me when I was the breadwinner” and go from there.

I remember what I always wanted. It consisted of:

Bacon, eggs & coffee in the morning
A packed lunch
A big dinner waiting with a cold beer for when I get home
A bit of peace
A shag

If I remember correctly, sometimes I used to get a coffee.

Now my wife’s proclivities are not quite the same as mine but I thought the ‘do unto others’ angle worth perusing. To this end in the first week I did the following:

In the mornings

I made my wife a cup of coffee just the way she likes it.
I packed her lunch for her which changed daily but always included:

– Two types of fruit

– A variety of biscuits

– A drink such as a can of cola or a flavored breakfast milk

– A sandwich that always contained at least one form of dairy, meat and/or egg

– Occasionally a thermos of soup

I then made the children’s breakfast and generally kept them out of her hair as she prepared for the day. Then it was kisses goodbye and well-wishes for the day ahead as she drove off.

In the evenings

Dinner was always on cooking when she arrived home, and always a recipe I knew she enjoyed.
A glass of chilled wine was held in my outstretched hand.
The children awaited her – clean, fresh faced and eager to tell her about their days activities. Sometimes they held flowers we had picked for her that day.
After dinner I would whisk the kids off to bathe whilst she watched her evening shows.
When the children went to sleep I had my ‘bedroom eyes’ on and something sexy underneath my dressing gown in case she needed some ‘stress relief’ from her hard day.

*Omelette made from organic, free range duck eggs- Mr Perfection over here!*

Of course, that was me in the first week of being a househusband. So far in the second week:

She got a glass of half-flat wine on Monday, and only then because there was some leftover from a bottle on the weekend.
Tuesday the kids and I slept in so she had to make her own damn lunch.
Wednesday the kids were filthy because they had been traipsing around the farm with me while I fixed a pump at the creek and we ate red meat because that’s what I wanted.
No hot dinner at all waiting Thursday as I needed her to bring home groceries to make it.
Today on Friday the sexy underwear got put back in the bottom draw, since it seems to have caused more bemusement than arousal over the last fortnight

*Big Angry Trev’s version of ‘subtly seductive’*

So the first lesson I have learned as a Househusband is:

“It’s easy to start with perfection, but impossible to maintain it”

Hmmm… maybe this gig won’t be as easy as I first thought.

Got something to say? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

Related Articles:

Househusband Tales #2 – Bathrooms are Bull$hIt!

Transformer Toy Reviews

Toy Review – RID Twinferno

September 8, 2017 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Well to be honest we don’t bloody know what it’s supposed to be! Let’s try to find out together dear readers as we examine Deluxe Sized, Robots In Disguise: Combiner Force Twinferno (a double mouthful eh!)

*Try and find which ‘Year of the…’ this figure represents*

Robot Mode

A basic enough looking robot. Like all other ~~Doublecross~~ Twinferno toys you have the dragon heads as the hands which always looks cool. The red is too garish and makes his head blend in with the rest of his body too much. You can swivel the head to pose him in different positions but his shoulders are that high that it looks weird unless he is really looking forward. The flame pieces can be placed in the dragon heads to make them look like they are breathing fire. They can also be put in the holes under the dragon’s chins but this doesn’t really look great.

Alt-Mode

*‘What am I? I’m having a double-identity crisis!’*

Ok, what the hell is this supposed to be? Did G1 Doublecross and G2 Dreadwing smoke some bad Energon one night and come up with this weird amalgamation of themselves, with Tony Stark coming in at the last minute and saying “throw a bit of Hot Rod red in there”? I mean seriously – this thing is weird! It’s not a stealth bomber (definitely not with that colour scheme!) and it’s not a twin-headed dragon. Instead it’s a weird Fuzor-esque hybrid of the two that looks like it’s out of some weird futuristic Chinese mythology. I guess if you imagined it in real life it would be kinda badass, a bomber flying over the city with two dragon heads hanging off the front writhing and spewing flames, and indeed the heads/necks are maneuverable in this mode. The flames are supposed to come out the back to show his speed, but once again you can put them coming out of the mouth.

*‘It’s a medical condition – don’t you judge me!’*

Transformation

Like all RID toys this figure is almost insultingly easy which makes it great for a young kid but certainly lessens the appeal for the older collectors.

Worth your money?

It seems that obscure characters get these little resurgences sometimes. A few years ago it was Guzzle who was showing up in the Movie and Kre-O lines as well as the IDW comics. Now its ~~Doublecross~~ Twinferno showing up in the Titans Return, Tiny Titans and RID lines. Odd actually that the Tiny Titans version, despite being a subline of RID, is based on the G1/TR version. Speaking of which, if you want a cool modern representation of this character then I would definitely go the Titans Return version which is twin heads and shoulders above this one.

Got something to say about this toy? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

Related Articles

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Big Angry Trev!

Tag Archives: Big Angry Trev

Movie Review – My Little Pony

Big Old Trev turns 40

Toys Review – The Last Knight: Steelbane, Cogman & Sqweeks

Meet & Greet at the Collectormania Fair

Meet your favorite blogger!

Big Angry Trev is coming to Sydney!

That’s right – everyone favorite blogger will be making a personal appearance at the Penrith Collectormania Toy & Hobby Fair on Sunday October 15^th from noon onwards. Trev will be kissing hands and shaking babies as he meets his adoring public.

For you long time fans, this is your chance to meet your one true hero in the flesh – and win a great prize!

All you have to do is spot me at the fair, come up and introduce yourself with “You Big Beautiful Blogging Bastard You!”

Be the envy of all your friends and family and prepare to bask in the reflected glory of Big Blogger Trev – at the Penrith Panthers Pavilion on Mulga Road. See you there!

Disclaimer:

Househusband Tales #3 – The Library Playgroup

Toys Review – the Combiner Force Stunticons

Househusband Tales #2 – Bathrooms are Bull$hIt!

Househusband Tales #1 – Pampering Poorly Perfected

Toy Review – RID Twinferno

Join the Trevolution!

Big Angry Trev is coming to Sydney!

That’s right – everyone favorite blogger will be making a personal appearance at the Penrith Collectormania Toy & Hobby Fair on Sunday October 15th from noon onwards. Trev will be kissing hands and shaking babies as he meets his adoring public.

For you long time fans, this is your chance to meet your one true hero in the flesh – and win a great prize!

All you have to do is spot me at the fair, come up and introduce yourself with “You Big Beautiful Blogging Bastard You!”

Be the envy of all your friends and family and prepare to bask in the reflected glory of Big Blogger Trev – at the Penrith Panthers Pavilion on Mulga Road. See you there!

Disclaimer:

Join the Trevolution!

That’s right – everyone favorite blogger will be making a personal appearance at the Penrith Collectormania Toy & Hobby Fair on Sunday October 15^th from noon onwards. Trev will be kissing hands and shaking babies as he meets his adoring public.