Transformers Fan Interview – Santa Claus

December 24, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Today, instead of interviewing our usual Aussie Transformers Fan, we will be interviewing an international one, and someone who could be considered the quintessential expert on all things toys. Today we are in fact interviewing the Jolly Fat Man himself, Santa Claus.

B.A.Trev: Santa, thanks for joining us for this interview. I appreciate this is a very busy time of year for you.

Santa: Ho ho, no problem Trevor. I’m a big big fan, love your work.

B.A.Trev: Glad to hear it. And thank you for being so generous over the years.

Santa: Oh ho ho, you’ve always been such a good boy!

B.A.Trev: Now, are you aware how these interviews work?

Santa: Oh yes, I read everything on your fantastic site so I’ve seen all the previous interviews. Have at it!

B.A.Trev: Ok, here we go:

QUESTIONS ABOUT YOU
Real name or what friends call you?

Saint Nick, but my friends call me ‘Joe’

Country you live in?

I actually live on constantly converging and shifting sea ice in the middle of the Arctic Ocean. Makes getting the mail a real headache.

Your occupation?

Anthromorphic Personification of Yuletide cheer and commercialism

Your dream job?

Surfer

Your age?

I stopped counting after 300, it got depressing.

Single/married/kids?

Got a missus. There are lots of children-sized elves that work for me but they are NOT my kids, no matter what that lying bitch Debbie in accounts says!

What other (non-toy) interests do you have?

(sighs) Keeping warm

What type of music/movies/TV/books do you enjoy?

I’m a big fan of Die Hard. A great Christmas movie and book!

TRANSFORMER QUESTIONS
Transformers Allegiance, if you had one?

Ho ho, an Autobot of course!

Your Techspec motto if you had one?

‘Whatever happened to wooden trains?’

What existing, official Transformers character best describes you?

Astrotrain, he can carry a huge amount and fly around the entire planet in one night!

Which special ability of any Transformers character would you want to have for yourself?

Skywarp’s teleportation, then I’d never have to go down another damn chimney again!

Do you think you will collect Transformers until you die?

(looks morose and resigned) Other people get to die, I just have to go on… and on…. and on. Never do I get to feel the sweet kiss of eternal slumber.

Have you attended any fan-meets, Fairs, Conventions?

Well, I attend a lot of shopping malls I guess.

Any creative endeavours with Transformers (drawing, writing, customising, etc)?

I outsource all that these days.

Favourite series/era/year, and why?

Beast Wars – all the kids in that era wanted were pointed sticks and to not get eaten by robotic insects.

Least favourite series/era/year, and why?

Cyberverse – where is the craftsmanship? I’d fire an elf on the spot if he designed that Warrior Megatron figure.

Collect any comics (which ones)?

Do you know what snow does to paper?!

Favourite Comic issue/story, and why?

The IDW Holiday Special is a wonderful! The Dreadwind one where he is visited by ghosts is very good as well.

Favourite Cartoon episode/story, and why?

Definitely Transformers Animated: Human Error I & II. The one where Gears becomes all jolly is a favorite from years gone by.

Favourite Video/Board game and why?

Transformers: The Robot Warrior Game. No electronics to soldier.

Favourite Character, and why?

Tracks. He is a flying car – no rule that says ground vehicles shouldn’t fly, it’s very believable.

Sexiest Transformers (robot) Character?

Toys are NOT sexy! They are to delight youngsters and encourage play and creativity…

… I do have an Elita-1 Mousepad though.

Which Transformers character would you want to exist for real?

Tidal Wave – big enough to house my manufacturing plant and he won’t sink every time the ice moves. (looks exasperated) Honestly, why did I choose to live there – it makes no sense!

First Transformers toy?

I remember making a little wooden man who when you folded him backwards would look like a horse. I thought it was a real winner until Ms Claus pointed out that the mans (expletive deleted) became the horses tail. What’s wrong with it being anatomically correct I say? You have dolls that (expletive deleted) and (expletive deleted) themselves for the kids to clean up for (expletive deleted)s sake!

Worst toy(s) ever in your opinion?

Atari Jaguar – do you know how long it took to make the controllers for that thing? 3 elves died of exhaustion and then no one played with the finished product anyway!

Toy(s) that were most disappointing when you got them?

An elf once presented me with a snow globe with a figure of me inside. Yeah, that’s what I want, to be in more (expletive deleted) ing snow! I kicked his little (expletive deleted) so hard he was (expletive deleted)ing blood for a week!

Thoughts on gimmick and non-convertable Transformers toys?

Non-convertible Transformers are great! Take zero time and effort to build.

Thoughts on unlicensed fan-project figures/accessories?

Wannabe toymaker hacks – the lot of’em!

Thoughts on Crossover Transformer toys (Star Wars, Street Fighter etc)?

I always thought some Yuletide ones were in order, maybe a sleigh that turns into a jolly figure in a red suit? Would be a real winner!

Thoughts on the Transformers Brand over the last five years?

They seem to get more simplistic as the years progress which is less work for me I guess. Takes an elf about 5 minutes max to put together a Cyberverse toy.

Which single TFs toy should every fan own?

Optimus Prime – he is big red and his trailer is magic!

Which Transformers toy/product would you give as a wedding present?

Don’t I give enough presents already?!

B.A.Trev: Many thanks for answering those questions. Do you have time to answer a few questions sent in from fans?

Santa: Ho ho, of course Trev, anything for all the little boys and girls out there.

Questions from Fans:

From Michael

Hey there Santa. Pretty sure I asked for a G1 OP circa 1984/85. Any reason you didn’t deliver?

(Just so there’s no lingering ill-feeling, would be happy to accept one this year. MISB if you please).

Because you were on the naughty list then and you are still on the naughty list now! I’ve seen the Facebook clips where you demolish perfectly good toys in order to ‘make them better’. How do you think that makes me feel!? My craftsmanship isn’t good enough for you – you need to turn a perfectly good Transformer into a MOTU figure!? Screw you Michael – if I see you you’ll be getting a lump of coal shoved straight up your ass!

From Trent

So Santa, there is only one of you. And obviously there is a limit to whatever black magic you tap into to fly around the World in one night. This is most evident in the fact that no 2 Santas are the same when it comes to Christmas photos. So how do you explain it? My parents tried saying that they are your elves dressed up but we both know that’s false. Your elves are far too short to impersonate you. How do you justify holding kids to the high standard required to get presents year after year when you yourself lie and send impersonators, impostors even, in your stead? Do you see the hypocrisy here Santa? What does Mrs Clause think?

It’s called outsourcing – just be thankful all my Santa’s aren’t some call-centre rejects from the 3^rd world. And I’m trying to grow a franchise here, people pay me to dress as me and give me a cut of their earnings, then they recruit 10 more people to dress as me and they get a cut of their earnings and so on. It’s called an ‘iceberg scheme’ and everyone wins!

As to what Mrs Claus thinks, just leave that alone. The day I came home to find her in bed with 3 Santa Impersonators and she swore that she thought I had just used some Xmas magic to clone myself in order to really give her stocking a good stuffing – it still haunts me to this day! I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.

Also, my next question; Why only the Christian world? What you got against everyone else you fascist?

They believe in me, they get a gift. They don‘t believe in me then they don’t. I live off the belief and worship of others and in return they get crass consumer products. It’s not fascism, its commercialism – where have you been?!

Santa: I thought you said these questions were from fans?

B.A.Trev: Er… yes. But I think some of them are more my fans than yours.

Santa: Grumble, fine let’s just get the rest over with.

From Jason

My question, I was always the good child growing up and my brother the naughty one yet he was younger and always got more presents than me. Wtf?

There is a thing called ‘The Hitler Gene’. It’s very diffuse now to the point that even when both parents have it, it doesn’t guarantee that all their kids will. You have it, he doesn’t. How do you think people would react if I was heaping extra presents on the opffspring of the great great, great nephew of the 15^th cousin thrice removed of the world’s greatest monster (not counting the guy that came up with Kiss Players)? Don’t blame me – blame Uncle Adolf!

From Lisamaree

Santa, so.. lugging all those toys around… how do you manage the storage of the pressies and where do they hide on the sleigh? Is it like Optimus Prime‘s magically disappearing trailer? And if so did he show you the trick or did you show him?

Indeed I do use a subspace fold in order to increase the storage capacity of the sleigh. I have to admit, I learned it from him. I might be centuries old but he has a few megaannum on me.

From Paul

Do you deliver presents to good protoforms on Cybertron too? Or do you delegate to a Cybertronian (and if so who?)?

I have a couple of reps on Cybertron who handle things up there on my behalf

Megatron was responsible for billions of deaths but has turned over a new leaf abroad the Lost Light. Has he done enough to deserve a present this year or will he get coal again? (Of course he could turn that coal to Energon so maybe that’s not a bad gift for a Transformer)

Well I have to handle things year by year. I can’t not give little Timmy a present this year because of naughty things he did the year before. So yes, Megatron will be getting a present…

… an old copy of ‘Interstellar Travel Guide to Pleasant Planets’. Of course most of the planets in it have been destroyed because of his war, but it can’t be helped if my gift reminds him of all the death and destruction he caused can it?

From Mayza

Movie Optimus has been executing Cons, will he be getting a lump of coal?

Those Cons were killing humans. Less humans means less belief to power me. Have at them I say Optimus! It’s ‘Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards Men’ not ‘bots’.

Also Santa, what are your thoughts on Michael Bay, will he also be getting a lump of coal?

I think all the reviews of the new Bumblebee movie, when compared to the reviews of The Last Knight, will be punishment enough this season.

From Dallas

After giving so many of us coal for so many years, do you regret that now, given you could have been giving us solar cells or something similar?

People were supposed to stick those lumps of coal under a heap of heavy books for a few hundred years so their descendants could have diamonds – not my fault if people burned perfectly good gifts!

Also, my kids said they’d like the first issues of Whatever IDW are going to produce next for Transformers, I told them it was a long shot since it’s not available yet, but they insisted.

I’ll have a chat with Vector Prime and see if something can be worked out.

B.A.Trev: Well Santa, thanks so much for taking the time to answer all these questions today.

Santa: Ho ho, my pleasure, Merry Christmas to all!

(sotto voce as he walks out) except for that Trent guy, now there is someone who is going to feel the sharpened end of a candy cane shoved right up his stocking!

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Movie Review – Bumblebee

December 23, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Over the past 5 live-action Transformer movies we’ve come to expect certain things. From the humans: wacky, half-psychotic characters and overly-sexualized stereotypes. From the robots: zero characterization and dialogue, overly-complex bodies and fight scenes one has no hope of following. Throw in a few convoluted plots and some smutty humour and badda-bing badda-boom, another TF movie pumped out by Hollywood.

However Transformers 6 – Bumblebee, seems to be something different. Something GOOD!

What a delightful breath of fresh air this movie is! It contains none of the issues listed above, and replaces them with relatable characters, great dialogue and a lot of heart!

The Plot (yes, there is one this time!)

The Bumblebee movie is actually a prequel to the last 5 movies, set in 1987. Bumblebee comes to Earth, after a 10 minute opening scene which will have every G1 fan looking for the tissues for their eye ducts (and possibly elsewhere) due to the amount of fan service contained within. The first 10 minutes is based on Cybertron and showcases G1 characters actually looking like G1 characters, still in their Cybertronian modes having a huge battle! They are all there – Soundwave, Shockwave & The Seekers all blasting away at the likes of Wheeljack, Arcee, Brawn, Ratchet and so on. Seeing the battle will be lost, Optimus Prime orders the Autobots to evacuate Cybertron and sends B-127 to prepare a base for them on the aforementioned Earth.

Arriving on Earth, B-127 is almost immediately attacked by the US Army (their involvement one thing that has not changed) and then near killed by Blitzwing, the only character in the movie bearing no resemblance to his G1 incarnation (besides having a jet mode). B-127 loses his voice, loses his memory, and manages to scan a Volkswagen Beetle before going dormant.

We now get introduced to the heroine of the story – Charlie. Just turned 18. But unlike Sam Witwicky she doesn’t seem like a nutjob. And unlike every female character before her, she seems to dress in a way that doesn’t border on the pornographic. In fact, Charlie turns out to be a very endearing character that the viewer comes to care about. This was a very smart move on the part of the new writers and directors, going with a female-teen instead of a male and keeping sexuality completely out of it. It stops them retracing old ground from the TF1 and good on them. In fact all the humans are fairly likeable and all seem to serve a purpose to the plot, rather than being thrown in for the sake of it.

You know what? It IS as sweet as this pic suggests!

At the same time this is happening, the only two completely new robot characters in the movie – the Decepticons Shatter and Dropkick make an appearance. In fact starting off by torturing Cliffjumper on one of Saturn’s moons looking for B-127. They soon find their way to Earth, adopt car alt-modes, (and later secondary flight alt-modes) and search for the missing Autobot in order to find Optimus. They trick the human army into letting them use their equipment and the race is on!

From there it could be said to be the usual. Charlie reactivates B-127, freaks out, he freaks out, they bond, they have some loveable adventures, they get found by the military, he saves her, she saves him, he saves her again, they get found by the Cons, have a huge fight and then save the day. It’s kinda predictable but is an enjoyable ride and very entertaining to watch.

Continuity Errors

Being a prequel, this movie should match up with the previous 5 and set the stage for TF1. It doesn’t. There are multiple continuity errors brought up in this, such as Bumblebee only arriving in 1987 when yet in The Last Knight he was shown to be present during WWII. Optimus arrives on Earth that same year rather than in 2007. The Transformers know English rather than learning it from the world wide web. There are many more but you get the drift. To be honest, this really should have been a reboot rather than a prequel, as this is far better than anything that has come before and I’d rather have the new ideas than the old.

G1 Goodness!

What?! Arcee isn’t a motorcycle that goes around on one wheel and has a face like a smashed in colander?!

For your G1 fans, this is the movie you always wanted. Bumblebee is a VW Bug. Optimus is a short-nosed truck with a big silver trailer. The Seekers on Cybertron are Tetrajets. Everyone looks like everyone hoped they would all the way back in 2007. There are plenty of Easter Eggs, it brought joy to my heart to see my son whoop with joy when Bee started playing ‘You’ve got the Touch’ when encouraging Charlie to dive. It’s… it’s just beautiful!

A PG Rating

Another smart move made by the makers of this film is making it PG rated. A lot of the adult Transformer fans have become pretty jaded from the last four films in particular, so this enabled the producers to open this flick up to a younger audience untarnished by Michael Bay scrotum jokes. And it’s worked. My son turned 6 three days before TF6 was released, so it was perfect to take him and his friends to. And they loved it! Some kids that age might find a few things scary, but most will enjoy it. No blood from the 2 humans that get killed, minimal swearing, zero sexuality. It was a smart way to go.

So worth watching?

Yes. YES. A thousand times yes! This is the movie we hoped for many years ago! So much heart and character and humour and joy! Great for kids, amazing for G1 fans; the only ones disappointed will be those in love with the Bayverse and those folk are hard to find these days. Take the whole family out to see this, you will not be sorry!

Got something to add? Pop it in the comments section below!

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Scalpers: A-Holes of the Collectors World

December 18, 2018 Big Angry Trev 2 Comments

Scalpers – the bane of collectors everywhere.

Nasty little parasites who eagerly buy up all the figures they can and then flog them for twice the price. Evil pricks without an empathy or remorse.

No, I don’t like scalpers – no sir!

Now I want to make a distinction here. I don’t consider scalpers people who sell rare old toys for a lot of money. Yes sometimes the prices they ask are ludicrous, but there is no rule saying you have to buy what they are selling. You need food. You need water. You need sleep and shelter. You don’t need action figures.

So if someone has an old toy from the 80’s that they are selling for 10 times what it originally cost, I don’t consider that scalping. The toy is not available anywhere else, it’s been maintained for 30 years, chances are there is someone out there that is willing to pay the larger amount and be happy with getting a long sought figure. That’s fine, no problem

No, what I consider a scalper is some unscrupulous sod that goes from store to store (and even online) when a new figure is released, buys every single one, then is selling them on eBay half an hour later for twice the price or more. In those cases you are a scalper sod. A prick of the highest level! Because you are stealing the opportunity for others to buy the item fair and square and then making them come to you to buy it at an inflated cost.

As a Transformer Collector, I have seen 3 major incidents of scalping over the last 6 years:

2013 – Hasbro Masterpiece Soundwave

Everyone was so excited for this figure! An MP Soundwave with 5 cassette warriors included! Personally I got on the American Toys’R’Us website the moment it was listed and refreshed the page for an hour until I finally got one in my basket. Only then to be thwarted at the checkout with ‘This item does NOT ship internationally’. Would have been nice for them to have that on the product listing. No wonder the company went out of business.

Half an hour later the item was completely sold out. And surprise surprise, within the hour those Soundwave’s were being listed on eBay for twice the price. Usually with the disclaimer ‘shipping will be delayed two weeks’ because these pricks didn’t even have the figure themselves yet!

The same thing happened in the US when Soundwave hit the physical TRU stores. People were walking in the moment the doors opened, taking every single MP Soundwave off the shelves and then going through the checkout. So if you came in at 10am – too bad! You want that toy now? You have to go online and pay the bastard that came in at 9 twice the price!

2015 – Combiner Wars Devastator

*Picture provided by fans still annoyed years later*

Rather famously here in Aus, there were several people (and I use the term loosely) in particular that went from store to store in Capital Cities and bought every single one! Once again, those figures were then listed online for twice the price within a day. The outrage on the Aussie TF chat forums was palpable. But to show the lack of ethics and empathy inherent within your average scalper, one seller even went online showing a photo of himself with a stack of Devastator’s and thanked the irate members of the Ozformers site for all the free publicity.

2018 – Heavily Discounted TLK Figures.

This has just happened within the last week here in Australia. Big W had a sale where a large range of figures from The Last Knight were being sold in stores at incredible discounts. Most notably Voyager class figures were going for $5! So many TF fans were rushing to stores to pick up figures they had previously been unable to afford, only to find the shelves empty. Why? Because the F’ing scalpers had bought them all and stuck them on eBay – that’s why!

…what the toys cost a few days later. Only a bit over 15 times the price!

So why do scalpers annoy me in particular?

This last incident, despite affecting my collecting the least, has annoyed me the most. I was lucky enough that a friend in the US was able to find a lone MP Soundwave sitting in a TRU for me, and likewise my mother-in-law was able to find a CW Devastator in Bathurst by asking the staff who luckily still had two sitting in their storeroom, the shelves themselves now bare. I missed out on the TLK figures last week but, for myself, I don’t really mind. I would have liked to pick some up at that price but it’s not like they were figures I felt I had to have.

No, what annoyed me about this last incident is it was robbing struggling families of the opportunity to buy a big toy at a cheap price at Xmas time. There are a lot of families doing it tough and can barely afford to eat, let alone get their kids a decent present. Especially out here in rural NSW where we are still in the midst of a shocking drought.

Transformers aren’t the cheapest of toys, and there are lots of little boys and girls who will never own one because their parents can’t afford it. Some of these kids wonder, when they have been good all year, why Santa won’t even bring them a little robot, whilst the kid up the road who habitually beats them up gets a PS4 under their tree. For those kids and their parents, the opportunity to buy a $50 Optimus Prime for only $5 would have been a godsend at Xmas! But nope, the scalpers had to go and buy them all up first and now eBay is awash with them. Bastards!

So scalpers out there, I say this to you: You are scum. You are filth. You have no kindness or empathy in your hearts. I may not believe in God but I do believe in karma and I hope you never sell a single figure. I hope that under your Xmas tree this year you find naught for yourself as you don’t deserve a gift. And I hope most of all that maybe you meet one of these struggling families one day and you have to stare into the face of those whose opportunity to give their kid a happy Christmas you stole. Maybe that might make you finally have some self-reflection. Because right now you are not a part of humanity, you are simply a leech that feeds of it.

Got something to add? Pop it in the comments section below!

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Book Review: A Die Hard Christmas

December 10, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Ask nearly any guy over the age of 30 what their favourite Christmas movie is and the answer will come back like a shot – ‘Die Hard’.

Yep, Die Hard 2 was set at Xmas as well and was also awesome, and there are plenty of other great Xmas flicks, but Die Hard – like John McClane – always wins. Before digital special effects, before movies going for nearly three hours, there was a cop caught in Nakatomi Plaza crawling around air ducts killing bad guys and making smart-arse quips.

Die Hard was AWESOME!

And now, three decades after the movie’s release it’s been put into book form – an Illustrated Holiday Classic!

Taking is structure from ‘Twas the Night Before Xmas’, this Xmas book outlines the movies story from start to finish, in a jolly Xmas narrative which will have any fan of the Die Hard franchise going ‘F*ck yeah!’

This book is definitely intended for grown-ups, as what Die Hard book would be complete without all the gratuitous blood and violence?

I don’t want to go into too much detail as it is a short book (but quite reasonably priced at roughly $16au) and if I put too much into this review I will spoil it for people. So all I will add is that if you are struggling to think of a pressie for someone special this Xmas, and that someone special is in particular an over 30’s guy, then GO BUY THIS BOOK! HE WILL FRIGGIN LOVE IT!

And I’ll let the book sign off, as there is no way it could be done any cooler:

Got something to add? Pop it in the comments section below!

Random Rants

The Playmate and the PM: Anderson vs Morrison

November 27, 2018 Big Angry Trev 2 Comments

In today’s rant I’m going to offer an opinion that will fly in the face of what most people are saying on social media.

The Pamela Anderson/Scott Morrison thing has been blown WAY out of proportion.

For those that don’t know, Pamela Anderson has been vocal about supporting Julian Assange and saying that the Australian Government should take action to save him from political persecution by the US. So that’s fine, no problemo. Personally I don’t really give a stuff when overseas celebrities have something to say about our politics, but then I’ve commented on social media about stuff Trump does so it’s not like I’m any better.

When asked about Anderson’s comments on commercial radio, Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison said:

Quote:

“I’ve had plenty of mates have asked me if they can be my special envoy to sort the issue out… um, with Pamela Anderson”

Now not the most PC thing to say I admit. In fact it was dismissive and pretty stupid. But lets look at it in context shall we?

Pamela Anderson has made and sometimes still makes a living from being a sex symbol. In the past she appeared naked plenty of times in magazines. Did a video Playboy special (back in the VHS days) where she was not only naked but had a prolonged simulated sex-scene with some muscular bloke – so we are talking softcore pornography here. Did a few movies where she either wore tight black leather or nothing at all and plenty of sex scenes there too. She even did the voice of ‘Striperalla‘, a cartoon which was mainly based on huge breast jokes.

Nothing wrong with any of this. Nothing. If that’s how you make your living and you are happy doing it and it hurts no one then more power to ya. I know I had Pam’s poster up on my wall when I was 18.

These days, at age 51, she tries to portray herself as an activist and, when it suits her agenda, pretend the last 30 years didn’t exist. But she spent decades purposely portraying and marketing herself as a sex symbol, it’s how she made her fortune. And she was more than happy to do so and be known for it when it meant the millions and movie roles kept rolling in. And she is still happy to, again – when it suits her agenda, use her sex-symbol status as can be seen in the (heavily airbrushed) posters she did for PETA just last year where she is posing in a tiny bikini.

She obviously still cares deeply about her sex-symbol status as is evidenced by all the plastic surgery she has had done on her face alone in the past few years. Though to be honest whenever I see a picture of her I can’t help but think of what comedian Bill Burr had to say ‘There is nothing wrong with looking your age! Wouldn’t you rather look like a 53 year old human instead of a 35 year old leather sofa?’ And I hate to say it Pam but perhaps it would have been better just to do what most of us do and simply let nature take its course rather than try in vain to fight it with so many chemicals and surgeries. Just a thought.

So considering what Pam has done and still does for a living, is someone saying their mates asked to be a special envoy to talk to you really so bad?

Pamela went on after the PM’s comment, long and loud and on every possible media outlet imaginable, calling the comments smutty and lewd.

Really? Really Pamela? I’ve watched you simulate ******* a guy senseless. You were happy for a sex tape of you and your hubby to be spread all over the net when it got you back in the spotlight. Some might say those things are smutty and lewd. All this guy said his mates would love to talk to you. Stupid but hardly the worst you’ve ever heard I’m sure.

Pamela has stated that yes, she used to do highly sexualized roles but doesn’t give people the right to make sexual comments. That’s fair enough and I agree with her. Fully. But really, this was a stupid but very mild thing to say. It was a comment in the context of addressing the statements of a celebrity who still actively promotes herself as a sex symbol. If it had been a male sex-symbol he may have said his female friends were lining up to be a special envoy. And if it was someone of either sex who was a librarian or a scientist or political analyst he may not have made such a flippant joke at all, or at least one that related to that persons chosen field as he did here. But then who know’s, maybe he would have said something worse. I certainly aint a fan of the man by any means.

In fact there is one main reason the Prime Minister should not have said what he said:

You are the Prime Minister of our country Mr Morrison and should hold yourself to a higher standard of discourse! You represent us on the world stage. Don’t stoop to the level of a crowd pleaser, even if it is in a less formal context like commercial radio. You should have ignored it or said she was entitled to her opinion, not make a comment that makes you look dismissive of women and like a sexist dickhead!

And Pam?

Get off your hypocritical high horse would ya! You are completely entitled to your point of view and to state it to whomever you choose. But don’t pose in bikini’s for PETA to further one agenda and then pretend that it was incredibly offensive for a man to say his mates would love to meet you in order to further another. Decide if you want the world to see you as a sex-symbol or want to leave that world behind. You can’t have it both ways. You just cant.

I think I’ll be actively turning off my TV or radio next time one of them comes on – I don’t want to hear anything either of them have to say.

Got a different opinion on all of this (I’m sure there are many that do). Feel free to write it in the comments section below.

Transformer Toy Reviews

Toy Review – POTP Inferno

November 26, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Finally we seem to be getting some of the Wave 3 figures from the Power of the Primes toyline on Australian shelves, a long wait for many of us who no longer do our shopping overseas online due to the GST. There is only one Voyager class figure in this wave and it’s a character that had their last Generations toy come out a full 10 years ago – everyone’s favorite firetruck – Inferno.

Robot Mode

Inferno has received a new head along the lines of his G1 incarnation. This is predominantly the reason I ended up picking him up as otherwise he would have looked like either Hot Spot or Pyra Magna/Megaempress. He comes with Hot Spots two guns which he can either hold in his hands, or be attached to the gestalt feet and then his back to form shoulder cannons. The box artwork shows him having a windshield on his chest like his other incarnations, however the toy itself looks like every other character that shares the mould and has chest armour instead. He is fairly tall and lanky which is at least kinda more reminiscent of his G1 heritage than the very stocky Universe version.

Vehicle Mode

Like all others of the mould he transforms into a Rosenbauer Panther 6×6 Fire Truck. He has his big long white ladder back like the G1 version which I believe is an improvement over the water cannon the Universe and Energon versions sported. However he is so long in this mode you can’t help but think ‘This is Hot Spot cosplaying as Inferno’. His guns from robot mode can be affixed to the base of the ladder, giving Inferno some alt-mode combat options.

Combiner Mode

I haven’t bothered to combine him here since he doesn’t even have a name for his gestalt mode. At first I thought has been slight retooling from the Defensor version with a visor instead of individual eyes but then I realise the yellow paint app had just gone over the nose. So really there is no difference except for the colour scheme. The combiner mode will add a lot of play value for younger fans, however for the GeeWun crew it’s hard to think of Inferno has a Gestalt torso (even if the Energon version was a combiner too) and he wont get much play in this capacity.

Worth Getting?

It’s a hard call. In some ways this version of Inferno is superior to the Universe version that came out a decade ago. However in some ways he is inferior too. If you have the Universe version of Inferno as well as any other version of this particular toy mould then this Inferno figure is an easy pass. But on the whole it is still a good toy, a decent representation of the character and the combiner gimmick will be fun for many. For the most part though I think I’ll be playing with my Masterpiece version more.

Got something to say about this figure? Pop it in the comments section below!

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Videos

Video – Magpie vs Goanna

November 13, 2018 Big Angry Trev 1 Comment

Yesterday I posted a short video showing a Sulphur-Crested Cockatoo trying to fend off a Monitor from it’s nest.

Well that cheeky Monitor is at it again! This time up a different tree near our chook pens and, since the chookies are inaccessible, he was after a Magpies nest of eggs.

In the short upcoming video, you will see how the Magpies defense differs from that of the Cockatoo. While both squawk as loudly as they can, the Magpie goes for a different attack and constantly swoops the Monitor at speed, trying to hit it with its pointy beak. Of course this is a dangerous game; whereas the Cockatoo attacked the tail, the Magpie attacks the head and you can hear the audible snapping of the Monitors jaw as it tries to bite the Magpie on each one of its strafing runs.

So watch and enjoy the second video of ‘Battle of the Natives’: Magpie vs Goanna:

Sadly the Magpie was not as successful as the Cockatoo. Later on in the afternoon my kids found two regurgitated eggs at the base of the tree – after all that fighting the Monitor couldn’t even keep the eggs down.

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Video – Cockatoo vs Goanna

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Hobby Farming, Videos

Video – Cockatoo vs Goanna

November 12, 2018 Big Angry Trev 2 Comments

Living on a farm can be fun in a scary kind of way sometimes. Not all our native creatures are always friendly, and sometimes they really don’t get along with each other, seeing each other as rivals or, more often, dinner.

Two years ago on my old farm I witnessed a Redback Spider killing a Blind Snake (I was later informed by several leading Australian reptile experts it was in fact a Lerista Skink that the spider was chowing down on). That was quite the sight to see!

Yesterday on our new farm I saw two other native Australian creatures in conflict that I never expected to be enemies. These were in fact a Sulphur-Crested Cockatoo and a Lace Monitor.

The Monitor, a solid 2 meters in length, had been sniffing around our duck and chook pens looking for some eggy snacks, but when I approached quickly scaled a nearby tree, where he camped for a while.

But his belly must still have been rumbling because soon he caught the scent of the nest of eggs the Cockatoo had several branches above and decided to slowly sneak his way up for a snack.

This short video shows the Cockatoo taking issue with this. Whilst not silly enough to attack the Monitor head on, the Cockatoo did its best to ward this raider off. It did this by shrieking loudly, flaring its wings and crest and attempting to bite the Monitors tail with his beak. He eventually does a quick fly-by and gives it his best shot.

So enjoy this ‘Battle of the Natives’ in this video: Cockatoo vs Goanna.

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Games & Competitions, Transformatorium

Review – Metroplex Pack: Transformers TCG

November 9, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

A few months ago the Transformers: Trading Card Game was released. Much like Magic: The Gathering, this game focuses on using different characters whom you instil with different defences, attacks and upgrades, to take out the opposing team, all whilst taking advantage of their own unique abilities.

Now, not long after it’s release, we have the first committed deck since the Starter Pack – the Metroplex Deck. Due for international release on November 16^th, this deck appears to offer a whole new element to what is quickly becoming a popular and addictive game.

Wizards of the Coast and Hasbro have been kind enough to send me for free both the Starter Pack as well as the new Metroplex Deck so as to do a review on this blog. It should be noted that I have received no financial remuneration to write this, nor have either company tried to dictate the content of my review. So I’d like to thank Wizards of the Coast and Hasbro for their generosity.

Luckily for them, I’m pretty taken with these packs so their generosity might just get rewarded through subsequent honesty.

This review is focused primarily on the Metroplex Deck, and in writing this I make the assumption that in reading it you are already familiar with Transformers: TCG and the various gameplay strategies it entails. If not then by all means check out the official website to see how the game works, then come back to get all the new extra information here.

The Metroplex Deck offers the following:

*1 Titan Character Card: METROPLEX

*3 Character Cards: SCAMPER, SIX-GUN and SLAMMER

*Ready to play Battle Deck of 40 Cards

New Characters

Now the first thing you will notice is the Metroplex Card. It is HUGE! 19.5cm x 14cm. Like the Transformers character it is based on, it dwarfs the regular character cards. And so do some of his stats:

Robot Mode – 6 Attack, 35 Health, 1 Defense

City mode – 4 Attack, 35 Health, 2 Defence

Now these Attack and Defence stats are pretty common but his Health is MASSIVE! The most a character has had up to this date has been 21 with Cosmos, and Metroplex outshines him by a full 14 points!

The other is his Stars. Each team can have a total of 25 Stars spread over their character cards, which usually dictates a team of 2 to 4 characters. However Metroplex has 25 on his own! This makes him a team unto himself. A team of one… or so it would seem.

Anyone familiar with the G1 cartoon and toy representations of Metroplex will remember he had 3 sidekicks. First Scamper who turned into a Cybertronian Battle Car, Six-Gun who would disassemble his robot form into Weapons useable by Metroplex, and Slammer who was a drone tank. All three are represented here. And all three are subordinate to Metroplex in a way we will examine shortly. However before doing so it is worth noting that these characters are useable in regular teams. With their relatively low 4 Star ratings, if you have a team made of 21 Stars, one of these guys is perfect to round up the numbers.

Character Abilities

Metroplex differs from other character cards in many respects, and not just by his size. Hidden underneath Metroplex are the three sidekick cards. Whenever you flip your Metroplex card from Robot to City side, he is able to deploy one of these characters. This makes flipping every opportunity you get essential, as you need to get him to robot mode and back again in order to deploy another character. This in of itself is perhaps more important than the almost inconsequential differences between the Attack and Defence stats of his two modes.

Each sidekick has different abilities. Slammer for instance, being a drone, has no robot mode and will deal out 1 Attack Damage to every enemy bot when first released. This makes him a favourite to bring out first in order to hurt as many enemy bots as possible before you KO any of them.

Scamper and Six-Gun’s various abilities rely on Metroplex still being on the board as they mainly power up his abilities. Whilst this makes them a boon to your main Metroplex card, it lessens their value considerably when being used in a team which does not contain the Titan.

Dedicated Battle Deck Cards

The Metroplex Deck is designed to be used by a single player against an opponent. As such it has dedicated cards that are of no use in a regular deck, but are very advantageous when using with this dedicated team.

Rally The City allows an extra card per character you have out (if you still have Metro on the board).

Height Advantage gives Bold 4 so when you use Metroplex to attack you get to flip 4 extra cards.

Protected by Metroplex means that you can transfer any damage being inflicted on your sidekick characters to Metroplex instead. Out of the three cards I found this one to be the most useful. Given Metroplex’s huge Health and the extremely poor Health of his Sidekicks (all pretty easy to knock out in a single round) it helps to keep these little guys on the playing field for an extra turn or two.

In Gameplay

I wont go into all the technicalities and ins and outs of using this deck against an opponent as there are just too many scenario’s to cover. However I can point out some trends I found when pitting the Metroplex Deck against a team made up of the Starter Pack:

*When playing the Basic Game (not using special abilities etc) which I played with my 5 year old son, the advantage tends to lean slightly in favour of Metroplex, even without his ability to deploy the smaller bots. His Health is just so massive, and combined with a 6 Attack Rating in robot mode, means you are able to withstand the onslaught he receives from being the only target on the board as you KO your opponent’s cards one by one. He is by no means invincible, but he is definitely hard to beat.

*When playing the Advanced Game which I played with a bunch of my nerd peers, surprisingly the advantage tends to lean slightly towards the opponent, even with you being able to deploy Scamper, Slammer and Six-Gun. Your opponent using the Special Abilities of cards means that your three smaller bots are often KO’ed as soon as they hit the board, with only a Protected by Metroplex card having a hope of saving them. You may find that your opponent often uses this strategy, going after the little guys as soon as they are able before focusing back on the big guy.

Also with more bots being on the opposing team, the opposition has the chance to have more Upgrade, Attack and Defence boosts in play as well as having a greater range of opportunities to use their characters synergistically with each other. Once again, it is by no means impossible to defeat your opponent, but it can be a hard road with a bit of luck required to take the win.

So is this Pack worth buying?

If you are a Transformers: TCG player then it is a most definite yes! The introduction of a Titan Card adds a whole new element of gameplay, and the pack comes with 4 characters and three action cards that you cannot purchase anywhere else. It would have been nice to see Trypticon released first (as I’m sure he eventually will be) as it means the two dedicated packs released thus far have all Autobots in them (the Starter Pack containing Bumblebee, Optimus Prime, Red Alert and Ironhide). Part of the fun of anything remotely Transformers is pitting Autobot against Decepticon and I actually went out and purchased some Booster Packs just so I could play out some of these scenarios (luckily for me I scored both Starscream and Megatron). I would also have liked to see Scamper and Six-Gun have at least one inherent ability each which would be useful within a regular team that does not involve Metroplex, giving these characters more scope for play.

However despite the onus still being on the Autobot side, this pack is definitely worth picking up. I look forward to its general release in a week in the hopes one of my friends picks one up so that I can battle Metroplex Deck against Metroplex Deck – now that truly will be a clash of the titans!

Got anything to say about this Expansion Pack? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

Random Reviews

Movie Review – Tremors 6: A Cold Day in Hell

October 29, 2018 Big Angry Trev Leave a comment

Tremors. A flick about big monster worms that come out from under the ground and eat people.

That’s what most people think of when you mention a Tremors movie. What most people don’t know is that it isn’t just the one movie – there have been 4 sequels, a prequel and even a season-long TV series!

Tremors is actually one of the few Sci-Fi series that never seems to contradict itself. There is a coherency throughout all its iterations, ranging from the evolution of the Graboids (the big underground man-eating worms) to the the individual human story arcs, even the very minor characters. Plus the movies are just damn fun!

For my money Tremors 1 & 2 were by far the best of the flicks, and incidentally the only movies to get cinema release. The next three were all straight-to-DVD releases and whilst good (especially Number 4 which was the prequel) none quite captured the fun of the first two. Today we will be looking at the latest instalment in the Tremors franchise Tremors 6: A Cold Day in Hell.

The story starts off, as you can imagine, with a Graboid attack! What makes this attack unique among all those featured in previous films is that it takes place in the snow, specifically a glacial area in Canada. And when Graboids attack, who do you call for? Burt Gummer – that’s who!

Burt Gummer (played by Michael Gross) is by far the star of the Tremors series, the only character to have appeared in all six films (though it was his ancestor in the prequel) as well as the TV series. Burt is a jaded survivalist gun nut who likes living in Perfection Nevada because of its very low human population (and those that do live there often get eaten anyway) and its remoteness making it hard for the Government to interfere with him.

By the 6^th movie, Burt is the only resident left in Perfection and is living in the run down remains of the town store. However a visit from firstly a taxman saying Burt is about to lose what little he has, then one of the Canadian researchers along with Burt’s illegitimate son Travis (introduced in Tremors 5) prompts Mr Gummer back into action.

And from here the plot is really like all other Tremors films. There are Graboids to deal with along with the occasional Ass-Blaster (another stage of the Graboid life-cycle first introduced in Tremors 3). The Ass-Blasters retain their upgraded CGI look from T5 as do the Graboids – personally I thought both looked better before the reimagining, especially the Ass-Blasters which had previously resembled avian versions of Shriekers (another Graboid life-phase). I would have liked to see some Shriekers included since its been a while since they were trotted out. Gone is the concept of the Graboids three serpent-like tongues being detachable (T5) which personally I found to be out of line with established Graboid evolution (yes, I AM that much of a fan), however the tongues have retained their new power of sight (also introduced in T5) – you see one sneaking through a window to grab a lady and others dodging machete blows from Travis.

There are minor plot lines contained within. For instance Burt is slowly dying of a parasite he got from being eaten alive by a Graboid (T3) and needs liquid from a live Graboid in order to be healed. There are DARPA agents that intend to bio-engineer Graboids into weapons and so on. One of the key researchers, Valerie McKee, turns out to be the daughter of the two main characters from the very first movie. But all of this is background noise to what is essentially another movie along the lines of a ‘Don’t move! They sense vibration through the ground!’ mentality of your standard human versus Graboid movie we all expect.

*Michael Gross and a bunch of actors you probably wont see in the 7th flick*

Is this movie worth a watch? Well if you are a fan of the series then of course! Michael Gross does a stellar job as Burt Gummer yet again and there are monsters galore to shoot or be devoured by. However if you are looking for something new here that you haven’t seen before from the franchise you will be disappointed. Besides at the beginning of the film there are not even any action sequences in the snow, the remainder of the storyline takes place in a dry ‘hot spot’ which exists within the otherwise snowy landscape.

In short this film adds to the storyline of the human characters involved in Perfection but there is nothing new monster-wise and it lacks the fun and character of the first two movies. However for those loyal followers of the series, it is at least another 90-minutes of Gummer fun.

Now take two teaspoons of cement and harden the hell up!

Got anything to say about this movie? Would love to read it in the comments section below!

Big Angry Trev!

Yearly Archives: 2018

Transformers Fan Interview – Santa Claus

Movie Review – Bumblebee

Scalpers: A-Holes of the Collectors World

Book Review: A Die Hard Christmas

The Playmate and the PM: Anderson vs Morrison

Toy Review – POTP Inferno

Video – Magpie vs Goanna

Video – Cockatoo vs Goanna

Review – Metroplex Pack: Transformers TCG

Movie Review – Tremors 6: A Cold Day in Hell

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